August 2, 2014
Okay I have no idea if people even actually find this or read any of it or anything but uh um yeah: do NOT ever take a summer college science course. Especially if you are a perfectionist. It came in handy because otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to cover the cost of my car repairs but Chem 102 just makes me shake with fierce loathing because I’m only getting a B+ instead of an A. Yeah.
Got my most favorite story published by The Fanzine. Very thankful to them for that. Conjunctions tweeted about it. (About the story, not about me being grateful.)
Also there’s this, how I’ve spent almost a year in the conversion process and it’s been this tremendously wonderful thing for me health-wise and having-a-future-wise and financial-independence-wise and Judaism for me has nothing at all to do with Zionism but now my casual acquaintances all think I’m a fascist colonialist (I’m not, I don’t condone any of that, I condemn it) but also oh wait now that I can convert the head rabbi decided he hates me because I’m kind of weird and intense and I’m poor and don’t have a family so my conversion got put on hold. As a pre-med student you can declare whatever major you want, so I’m planning to pick up a Hebrew Studies BA because that’s how invested I am but explaining to my profs and classmates “no I’m not actually Jewish, I only got about 80% there” might be awkward. I could try another synagogue but they’re just gonna ask so what went wrong at the first synagogue? And I’ll have to explain I’m weird and intense.
I’m still trying to learn all the prayers I’m supposed to learn, but nobody bothered to tell me which ones, all I know is that I have no idea what I’m saying because they’re all in Hebrew. I have discovered I’m a decent singer, though, wide vocal range and good control of vibrato; I want to approach my chem professor and ask her if I can maybe sing to her in Hebrew or give her evidence of my hatafat dan (you don’t want to know) for extra credit but guess what: she thinks I’m kind of weird and intense. She’s right.
Also my copy of Photoshop fell out of my computer and broke so here’s all I have for images right now. Also apparently according to the experts abstract photography is not cool, it’s lame, but I sorta feel about the art world like an OG vampire feels about sunlight so no big. Images below are 6×6′ and 4×6′ respectively so lean in real close to get an approx. sense of scale.
May 17, 2014
Working on a few new photo things and a few paintings when I have time, working on fixing a novel and some new poems when I have time, mainly am busy 1) with pre-med classes, 2) with “shadowing” doctors, 3) with volunteering (soon), and 4) with converting to Judaism (by the end of summer). Those things all take quite a bit of time, so not much to see here, except a photo from a new series (information storage) and a link to a nice review of my book, which is now available from the publisher, from Spdbooks, and from Amazon.
March 29, 2014
I have about four essays half-finished for a new mag I write for; all are probably unpublishable. I sat down and wrote a story in 80 minutes last week, revised it, it’s done. I started another story and have a bunch outlined or half-done and that’s on the table but the deal is: I’m applying to med school. So what that means right now is that I’m embarking on a year-long journey to memorize the MCAT test materials and situations, I’m taking probably five semesters of college classes, I’m “shadowing” at least one, probably three physicians at work, and I’m doing the delicate dance of how-do-I-afford-this-I can’t-afford-this-maybe-uh-I-don’t-know.
So I’m not being very productive or getting any reading done, and I’m too exhausted to have anything interesting to say, but I’m cranking out a lot of new “photo” work, much of which is early video game meets clown act meets let’s see if I can get away with this. I’ll post a bunch soon but here now just more images, here from a series called Reverb mining my archives of old stuff.
March 21, 2014
March 10, 2014
I should be reading some books right now but I’m kind of avoiding it because of the bulk: there are eight books stacked on my desk, some of which are 700 pages long, and there are two pdfs on my desktop, and thirteen more books sitting on the couch to my right, one on my kitchen table, and about thirty, maybe more, occupying the entirety of an armchair behind me. And 95% of these books are library books. This doesn’t even count the maybe 25 books I’ve bought in the last four years and have not yet read. So “where do I start?” begets avoidance. Instead I clean and get frustrated with Hebrew stencils and make art. Here’s some art, and even that was a rush job: from snapshots to twelve finished images, some of which are below: about 90 minutes. And speaking of 90 minutes, 90 minutes ago is when I should’ve cooked and eaten dinner, so maybe that’s my next stop.
March 7, 2014
So the book is out, and I had another even weirder book come out, and I have a novel and poetry book to hustle, but my brain is mostly on images right now; abstract images, that is, and also trying to figure out a way to get into medical school. Med school seems like the sharp left turn that it sort of is but my soundbite is: I spent the first half of my life figuring myself out and want to spend the second half helping other people like I helped my mom when she was sick. Not this will stop the writing or art (or music) but I’ll just only be producing at twice the rate of normal artists and writers instead of five times the rate. Easy peasy.
And expect some posts coming up this weekend that contain actual content but until then I’ve been messing around with dollar store stuff in Photoshop again, and here’s one alley I stumbled down:
February 25, 2014
So I’m thinking over sending in a proposal to the 33 1/3 series to cover Coil’s 1991 album Love’s Secret Domain, but the main problems with that are 1) I am not really a good journalist, and 2) I have not actually read any 33 1/3 books (yet) and 3) Nobody has ever heard of that album. I have the whole Coil discography, minus the ANS Coil album; more and more often when making artistic or writerly decisions I ask myself: What would Coil do? What they mainly did was take tons of drugs and write gay sex magick songs in a range of styles that mainly made people really uncomfortable. And I don’t necessarily set out to make people uncomfortable but it definitely almost always happens. For a day or two, this week, I thought this was a bad thing. Then I got over myself and decided to write an Upper-Middle Class Family Drama novel to see what happens, and what’s coming out is that a straight guy takes his girlfriend’s straight younger brother shopping for suits at Milwaukee’s high-end mall, the bicker, hijinks ensue, and you know from scene one that one of them will die in a car accident but you don’t know who or when. I call it my “breeder” novel but that’s not really very nice of me.
Anyway. I named this series Disco Hospital after the Coil song of the same name. I have never taken drugs, not even pot or ecstasy or whatever, because: why? But I guess here are some photos to take drugs to while you look at them. What drugs, I’m not sure. They’re low-res but they’re 4×6 feet. Enjoy.